Excerpts from the new Memphis Animal Services (MAS) policy manual, which no one has ever seen as far as I know:
MAS Minder: Don’t touch the the puppy, Disease Spreader.
Adopter: Does MAS vaccinate all pets upon intake in order to reduce the spread of disease per standard shelter protocols?
MAS Minder: Supervisor! I got a combative one here!
Adopter: Thank you for showing me these 30 dogs. There are a couple I’d like to come back to spend time with after I see the other 300 dogs.
MAS Minder: Your 10 minutes are up. There’s the door.
Adopter: Oh! Could I at least pet one of the animals I’m interested in adopting, if I do it quickly?
MAS Minder: Supervisor! Disease Spreader becoming aggressive at Kennel 23!