Just a little something to lighten things up. This one made it through my e-mail’s spam filter and I thought it might make you chortle:
Hello, I am a Internet marketing professional. I had done a Google search under the keyword Memphis Nose Job and had run across your website yesbiscuit.wordpress.com. I see that you are not listed on the first page of Google for your particular search.
I am not sure if you’re aware of why you’re ranked this low but more importantly how easily correctable this is.
I think I probably AM aware but go ahead.
There’s no reason that you can’t have top three rankings for the keyword Memphis Nose Job based on your website structure and content. You have a very nice site.
Thank you. I mean, I’m not an Internet-with-a-capital-I marketing professional, but I do ok.
What you need is high quality one-way anchor text links. I can help you with this…..
Not only can I get you ranked for the keyword Memphis Nose Job but I am talking about all of your keywords on top of Google. Adding new high quality PR anchor-text links from the highest quality websites will produce the results and business you want for yesbiscuit.wordpress.com.
The right kind of links are crucial in getting top ranking… and I can hand deliver these quality links to you.
Hand deliver? So you’re coming over?
My partners and I own 1000’s of websites and offer private linking to hundreds of website owners just like yourself.
I didn’t send this email out to very many people but I do favor your website because I can see your website monetizing the targeted website traffic for the keyword Memphis Nose Job can deliver.
I always knew I was special.
I have your contact information and phone number. Would it be okay if I were to give you a call?
You have my phone number?!
I have a very simple way to prove to you that what I do works risk free for you to try. Nothing beats seeing the results with your own eyes.
Would it be okay if I were to give you a call? I would love to pursue this further over the phone with you or should I go somewhere else?.
Yes, please – that last thing.
I love it.
This is what you get for being so NOSY! Or is it NOSEY? Either way, get those QUALITY LINKS and go straight to the TOP so Wharton and Pepper will finally return your e-mail! LAWL, Memphis Nose Job. Maybe meant Snow Job?
I haven’t actually Googled to see where I rank in the Memphis Nose Job search but I think I’m fine with wherever that is.
Of course, *now* you’re on the second and third pages of returns! Sneaky!
Thanks for the much needed chuckle this afternoon!
Welcome to the crazy world wide web, Memphis Nose Job! Glad to have you aboard.
Oh…they were just trying to ‘brown nose’ you, hahameow!
Thanks, I needed that.
Just like lots of folks in memphis must need a nose job…
who knew they could be searching for it?!
This is a good reason to have caller ID. Anyone can get our phone #’s
I got a similar e-mail a few weeks ago and unfortunately I deleted it without reading to see what keywords I had triggered the communication with. Now I wish I had checked since I’m sure it must have been amusing! Not that much can beat “Memphis Nose Job.” Maybe Boston Face Lift?
Sooo, does this mean that needing plastic surgery could be a side effect from reading your blog? Cool! How’d you pull that off?!?
How funny – boy did I need that laugh. Maybe they can work it out so that MAS winds up as the top link for Memphis Nose Job? Or even better, Wharton :-)
OR, it could be the reason all those Memphians are so irresponsible with their animals, they are all having nose jobs!
Haha! Classic. Thank you so much for the hearty laugh! :)
This was a live link (which I did not click and I’m not making it live here) in a comment caught by the spam filter this morning. I like it:
How to be safe about you are giving at worst the awesome after your cats?
You should’ve sent his butt to MAS….they sure could use his help!